In summary

Today I took Neko to a birthday party. Which is not her best thing. It is a high stakes event where she is not the center of attention and someone else gets a whole lot of gifts.

Meanwhile, at home, Ellery decided to see what would happen if she stuffed a raisin up her nose. The answer? A fretful father, a visit from your grandmother, a pair of tweezers, and a big tantrum.

At bedtime, Neko asked about guns. She reasoned that we need them because that's how we kill animals, and we eat animals. Which makes sense, except how do you explain to a five-year-old the concept of slaughterhouses? And why that's okay, but guns aren't? I felt like I showed up for my 8am Chemistry class with a hangover and got surprised with a pop quiz. I give myself a C+ for my answers, and think I need to spend some more time hitting the books on that one.

The protocol of birthday parties. Lodged raisins. The loopholes of firearms.

Totally not addressed in any of my parenting books.