The Farm Report

For loan or short-term lease

Boy, 2.5 years, 36 inches, ridiculously cute, slightly used.

Will gladly accept return when he stops hitting, kicking, shoving, pushing, and stealing toys and thinks all of the above is top-notch comedy. Return also contingent on understanding concept of “time out” and not thinking it’s just a fun place to hang out, sing, and plan next act of defiance.