Category: Neko

I am extremely lucky that at this moment Neko is not 16 and asking for a brand new car, because if she were, I would run right out and buy her something fast and fun and completely inappropriate. Which is saying a lot, because I believe that 16-year-olds shouldn’t really have their own cars, but if they do, they should be big and embarrassing. Lots of rust, a broken radio and the occasional backfire are a plus.

Tonight, when I returned home, there was an envelope on my pillow with drawings and letters that spelled out in a very four-year-old way, “MOMLVUY” which translates into “Mom love you”.

In the envelope, was Neko’s drawing of all the characters in her favorite new show, Word World, illustrated with rather amazing detail. And on the back, she attempted to spell the names of several of the characters (Bird, Bear, Sheep, Dog, Frog).

To show my gratitude, I crawled into bed with her and whispered a thank you in her ear. Even though she was still asleep, she curled her arm backwards and pulled her cheek next to mine. We laid there for some time, folded into one another, and I really can’t imagine that life gets much better than moments like that.

I think that’s a picture of me, but it’s also a picture of a cat with a very wiggly tail. And grass. I love that we’re starting to get a ground line.

A few months ago, Neko started talking about something she wanted to spend her allowance on. I can’t remember what it was, but I suspect it involved inappropriately big boobs or something similar that makes me break out in hives. Anyway, I was suddenly on a mission to divert. I’ll put my foot down if I have to, but if I can redirect Neko’s interest, that’s way easier.

As I was strolling the aisles of Target one day, and stumbled upon the new line of Little Einstein’s toys. Now, I’m not a big fan of bringing more plastic into our house, much less plastic that makes a whole lot of noise, but I do kind of like what those Little Einsteins are trying to do and they don’t have breasts. So I snapped a picture on my iPhone, and so our journey began.

When she saw the picture, Neko got tunnel-vision. She would have that rocket. It would be hers. But at $4 a week, it was going to take 10 weeks to save up enough to buy the $40 rocket. We had forgotten to give her allowance for the past two weeks, so she started a little ahead, but for two months she has dutifully been checking off boxes, never once considering spending her money on something else. Today we hit the magic number.

I should take a moment here to Pat-Pat-Pat myself on the back (Little Einstein’s humor) for having the forethought to buy Rocket a few days after I saw him, since the shelves have been bare since then and they’re going for double the retail price on eBay. Yay, me!

Back to the story, I wish I had video of the moment. I’m not sure Neko was even this excited on Christmas morning. Bouncing and dancing and gripping her scissors to help Tom open the package. I have a feeling life is going to be rather Rocket-acular for a while.

Being a mom is reminding me what it was like to be a kid.

Today was Neko’s turn to be the “star” in preschool. (I think it’s really some other term that’s more PC, but that’s what she’s calling it, so I’m going to run with it.) This involves providing snack for the day, bringing in an item for “share bag”, and being the helper during the class time. I casually mentioned to Neko last week that it was her turn today, and she’s been beside herself with excitement ever since.

We’ve been talking about what snack we’ll bring, and how she has to provide clues for the sharing item. I thought we had everything nailed down, but this morning, 15 minutes before we had to get out the door, she had a meltdown. OVER HER HAIR, PEOPLE. Yes, I expected this in her teens. Even her pre-teens, but she’s FOUR.

She came in with one hairband and asked me for pigtails. But just one pigtail. I tried as hard as I could, but her hair is just too short for a ponytail. When I explained this, she had a complete meltdown. In between the wails of agony, I gave her two choices: pigtails or a barrette. This is all I can do. When she pulled it together, we tried the two pigtails, but she declared them too scratchy. We tried the barrette option, but we could only find the plain grey ones. The kid has not given two hoots about her hair since the day she was born, but today? Mission critical.

Ultimately, we decided that she would go sans hair accessories. I finally got her out the door and to school only five minutes late, but it made me remember that these things that seem small to us are so big in her world. She knew she would be center stage, and she wanted it to be perfect. Perfect snack. Perfect share item. Perfect hair.

I, um, have no idea where she gets these tendencies.

I know my posting has been spotty this week. We’re in that weird time where we have absolutely nothing to do (in terms of kid activities) yet a million things to do (in terms of work and other stuff). So I’ve been spending my time trying to keep three kids entertained all day and then frantically running in the gaps in between.

Anyway, it’s been quite a week.

Neko starts preschool tomorrow, and I think the crazy pace has let me kind of avoid thinking about it. But now it’s here, and maybe it’s the exhaustion, but I’m starting to get a little sentimental and emotional. I know it’s silly. It’s not like she’s going to kindergarten. It’s just preschool. And she’s been to school. When she was two, she went two hours a day for two days a week. But that was different. She was barely talking then and it was all really parallel play and learning that it’s not okay to eat paint or bite your neighbor.

She’s our first, so I’ve been able to keep her sheltered. She doesn’t know what a gun is. She isn’t aware that people think boys should be one way and girls another. She’s never heard derogatory names like “stupid” or “fatso”. She’s never heard a swear word.

From the moment she was born, she’s been under my wing. I’ve been there to keep her on the straight and narrow. I watched her discover the dust that floats in the sunlight and that caterpillars tickle when they walk on your hand. I’ve kissed nearly every bump and bruise. I’ve watched her succeed and fail.

I know this year she’s going to learn really important things like how to make friends and take turns and sit still and listen and that she can’t always be first in line. But I’m still sad. I feel like when I say goodbye tomorrow, we’re turning the corner. She’s not all mine anymore. Someone else is going to watch her discover and explore, succeed and fail. And I’m only going to see less and less of her as the years pass.

I’m also nervous for Shep. He’s been tippy and emotional lately. He bursts into heaving, sobbing tears at the drop of a hat. I don’t know if he senses a change coming on, but he’s not quite himself. I know it will be good for him, too. He’ll get a chance to be “the big kid” and make his own decisions. He won’t always have to play second fiddle. But he’s going to miss Neko terribly.

And Ellery will only know life with part-time Neko. She won’t know what it’s like to have her ever-present, and that’s a strange thing for me to wrap my head around.

I know it’s sentimental and schmaltzy. I know in a week or two I’ll be dropping her off like we’ve been doing it for years. But for tonight, I’m going to allow myself to wallow a bit.

We went to JJ’s today, and for the most part, everyone did amazingly well. Neko and Shep actually rode in that plastic car in the front of the cart without killing each other. I have a theory that those carts were clearly designed by someone who has no children, because if they did, it would be about twice as wide with a giant partition something like the Great Wall of China between the two steering wheels.

Anyway, everyone was doing well, even Ellery, who drooled about a quart from beginning to end of the trip, but was otherwise downright charming, if not a little pruney. But right at the end Neko started to lose it. Tom had forgotten oatmeal, so he took Neko with him to keep her occupied. When they met us at the checkout, Neko could barely contain her excitement as she showed me this polaroid of she and Tony the Tiger. We don’t eat Frosted Flakes, but somehow she knows who he is and is really excited to see him in person.

Now, she’s got some suspicions that perhaps this isn’t a real six-foot tall live tiger in the grocery store. She’s begun talking about how this is a costume and that there’s a person in there. But today it was like she finally got the proof to crack the case. Later, at home, she was examining her polaroid when she suddenly started pointing at the picture and screaming, “Skin! SKIN!”

Tom and I jumped about a foot in the air and then came to look at what got her so excited. “Look, right there. You can see the person in the costume. His SKIN.” And there, right at his wrist, his furry orange glove and sleeve had created a gap where, sure enough, you can see skin.

I should add that this week she also dug up this ancient Keith Haring book about babies with lots of cute illustrations, but it also includes one illustration where the baby is coming out of the mother’s nether-regions, prompting the inevitable, “What is this drawing all about and where do babies come from?” Tom changed the subject and I confiscated the book, and we managed to evade that one.

But seriously, this whole figuring out how the real world works? For the birds.

I’ve been trying to spend some one-on-one time with Neko. She’s in a tippy time in her life. She’s about to start school and spend less time with us. And her time with us is already squeezed, since she’s sharing it with two other siblings. I know it sounds like we’re trying to give her more attention than the others, but that isn’t the case. Ellery gets plenty of cuddle and squeeze time and Shep is about to get plenty of quality time while Neko is in school. Somehow it just seems like Neko is the one who gets short-changed.

I’m trying to take advantage of the hour she stays up later than the others. Tonight we cracked out a new game. This one is hard to describe, but essentially you are asked to build three “towers” which are a combination of blocks indicated by a card you draw out of a deck. You then use this crazy tool which is four “handles” attached to an elastic. Each person takes two handles and when you pull them, you can stretch it around a block and then use it to move it to your “castle” to build a tower. Plus, it’s cooperative instead of competitive, which is good, because we’re in a big-time “I win!” phase. Okay, it sounds weird, but Neko LOVED it.

Good stuff.

Neko starts preschool next Friday.

We kept her out of preschool last year. I couldn’t find a teacher we liked and I wasn’t sure she was ready. But this year we found a fantastic teacher, and I think she’s going to do great.

Neko is less convinced of this.

We’re doing our best to get her prepared. Tonight she had the preschool open house. I’m happy to report that she actually played and did the project they provided. I don’t want to speak too soon, but I think she might be just a tiny bit excited.

Please remember that every time Neko moves to a new level of drawing it’s like when the baseball fanatic dad finally sees his kid hit a home run. So please humor me on this 846th post about her drawings. (Shep and Ellery, I promise you equal time when you start drawing.)

Neko has discovered Sharpies. There’s something magical about a permanent marker. It’s powerful. And she has to ask permission to use them, so that makes it even more special. Today she sat down with her toy space shuttle and drew it, concentrating on each detail. You can only see the edge of it, but at the bottom is all the smoke it leaves behind on take-off.